Moms-to-be have this wonderful bonding experience available because they can actually feel their children growing inside them. They get to experience them moving around, causing breathing, stomach, bladder, etc. issues. (I didn’t say they were all good experiences ). What about us dads-to-be? We get the short end of the stick – unless you do something about it.

Granted, we won’t be able to feel the kids move until they get big enough, but that doesn’t mean we have to wait until then to begin bonding with them. I may sound like I’ve come straight from the looney bin on this one, but I actually talk to the twins every day. I have a nightly routine before bed where I get really close to Rebekah’s tummy, place my hand about where the kiddos are, and talk to them. I’ll tell them whatever’s on my mind – most of the time I’ll tell them that their job right now is to grow “big and strong”, and before they know it, they can come out and play. They can’t really hear me yet, but it’s still fun for me to think they can and to tell them things. We started a baby registry a few days ago and afterward I told them all the cool things that Dad put on there for them (even if Mommy told me not to in some instances).

Sometimes for fun, I’ll have my own little conversation with them – and make up their side of it. I’ll say something to them and then put my ear to Rebekah’s tummy to pretend like I’m listening to them. Then I’ll “translate” what they said for Rebekah. Sometimes it’s goofy stuff like they are having a fight with each other and Twin A is mad at Twin B because Twin B kicked Twin A (not old enough to know what they are yet, so I can’t call them by name). Other times if Rebekah is feeling crummy, I’ll tell her that the twins said “We’re sorry, Mommy, but we have to grow big!”.

Take it for what it’s worth, but it’s fun for me.

Well, I’ve slacked off again and not written a post in a while – but at least it was for good reason. WE’RE HAVING TWINS!

Two weeks after our embryo transfer we found out that we were pregnant. Rebekah’s HCG level as around 5,000 – anything over 10 signals pregnancy. At that point we figured it was just really high from the transfer and the medications, we weren’t thinking multiples at that point.

A couple weeks after we heard the good news about the pregnancy, we went in for our first ultrasound. It was during the first ultrasound we first learned we were having twins. When they first started the ultrasound I was watching on a separate monitor. I saw what I thought was a kiddo, but then it disappeared and another one appeared. I thought to myself “Was that the same one, or did I just see 2?”. It was about that time when the doctor said “Here is your first twin…”. Rebekah and I looked at each other and were like “What did he just say?!” – then he said, “…here is your other twin – congratulations!”.

Since then, it’s been a whirlwind. With carrying twins, Rebekah is completely worn out. Those little guys (or gals) are literally sucking the life out of her – so she has been very tired most of the time. Since she’s been so worn out, I’ve had to pick up some of the duties around the house that she normally does. I’ve been doing quite a bit of the cleaning and picking up, in addition to my normal duties of cleaning and yard work, etc.

After finding out we’re having twins, I’ve been doing a lot of research to find out info about raising (and affording) twins. I’ve been able to find some good resources out there from Dads of multiples who write about their personal experiences and give tips and tricks – which I’m thinking about doing the same for other Dads out there. Rebekah is very thrifty and I’m “resourceful”, so anything I can find out I’d like to pass along to other Dads-to-be like me to help them keep from totally freaking out.

We are so blessed that God has taken care of us and the babies so far. We could not have made it this far with Him guiding us and protecting the babies at every turn.

We’re expecting the twins to arrive sometime around late December or early January – so it will definitely be a great Christmas present this year.

Until next time (hopefully sooner than it was this time…),
-E

Today was an amazing day! We transferred our Snowflakes and are now waiting to see if they “stick”. So how did our day go? Here’s the recap:

Our transfer was scheduled for 9:00 AM, so we arrived at the hospital at 7:15 as per our instructions. We were expecting this procedure to be very similar to the trial transfer that Rebekah had several weeks ago and were baffled by why we had to be there so early. It turns out not to be quite so simple, but you’ll see that as the story goes on.

We were registered and taken back to the room, Rebekah had to answer the gambit of questions very similar to the ones I had to answer prior to my surgeries. We both looked at each other with bewilderment when the nurse left the room and wondered why all that was necessary when in our minds the procedure was simple. When the nurse returned she explained that Rebekah needed to change into a gown and I would need to change into scrubs. I was still not seeing why this procedure was so “medical” when the procedure in the office was so simple.

After we both were changed into our new duds the nurse that would be assisting came into talk with us for a bit. She explained what would go on in the procedure and that we would be in a special operating room that is kept at the perfect temperature for embryos. It was quite warm in there to say the least, but after a while we got used to it. Once the nurse, Dr. Matthews and the embryologist had all met with us, it was time to move to the OR.

We made the short trip down the hall to OR where they began to prep Rebekah for the transfer. Shortly after they wheeled our Snowflakes into the room in a special NICU incubator equipped with a microscope. While they were getting her setup, I was taken a side by the embryologist and given the opportunity to look at the Snowflakes under the microscope. It was rather amazing to look at them under the microscope – but that wasn’t even the coolest part. She zoomed out a bit so I could get an idea of the size of the embryos and where they were located in the petri dish. Once I was able to spot them, she had me step away from the microscope and take a look at the dish in that same area. Amazingly, I could see the Snowflakes in the dish!! Now it wasn’t as detailed as under the microscope, but I could definitely see 2 small specks in the dish.

Even though the road we have been down has been very tough, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. How many other Dads will be able to say that they saw their babies like that? Not very many, but I am one – and it was hands down one of the coolest experiences I’ve ever had.

After I got to see the Snowflakes, we continued with the transfer. The embryologist prepared the embryos in a small catheter that Dr. Matthews used to transfer them. We were able to watch what was happening on the ultrasound. Once she was ready, Dr. Matthews told us to watch and all of a sudden we saw a bright white spot on the ultrasound picture. Those were our Snowflakes being transferred! Again – one of the coolest things I’ve seen! That was it – we were finished with the transfer. It was off to the recovery room for an hour or so before being discharged.

Now, the waiting game begins. For the next few days, Rebekah is on bed/couch rest and then it’s a pretty restrictive list of activity until she goes back in 2 weeks for a pregnancy test to see if our Snowflakes “stuck”. We definitely appreciate all the prayers and would appreciate your continued prayers and support in the next few weeks as we have to wait for the results.

As an extra special treat – we got a picture of our Snowflakes today! Below is our first baby picture!

The Snowflakes on their transfer date.

First off – I sincerely apologize for not keeping this thin updated like I should. Unfortunately, right in the middle of everything going on in our Journey, work decided to drop a major project in my lap with a ridiculous timeline. I had been working a fair amount of overtime, so the last thing I wanted to do was pick up a computer and do much.

So – the day we’ve been waiting so long for is finally approaching. This Friday, May 7, we’ll be transferring our Snowflakes! They arrived safely in Charlotte a couple of weeks ago and are sitting safely at the Women’s Institute downtown.

We don’t have a time set as of yet, but Friday is definitely the day we’ve been waiting for. We’d like to thank everyone for all their support and prayers over the past year. It has been a year of ups and downs – but the ups have outweighed the downs and how far we’ve come is a testament to the power of prayer and what the Lord can do.

Over the coming days and weeks, we’d like to continue to ask for your prayers and support. We’d ask specifically for prayer in the following areas:

• Dr. Mathews and the staff at the Women’s Institute who will facilitate the thaw and transfer of our Snowflakes
• For our Snowflakes and that they survive the thaw
• For Rebekah – she’s on a ridiculous course of medications for the transfer. The medication schedule is quite crazy and it takes the both of us to remember them all and make sure they are administered properly.

It’s hard to believe that everything we’ve struggled for is finally here – and amazing how far the Lord has brought us in our journey and how close He’s brought us to one another. I can’t wait to see how He writes the next chapter in our journey.

We received wonderful news yesterday – we have a week scheduled for our Snowflake transfer! The transfer is scheduled to occur sometime the week of May 3. I’ve been joking with Rebekah that this is going to be a perfect anniversary present (it will be 3 wonderful years on May 5).

To me, it’s amazing how the Lord works – He works on His time table, not ours. The host clinic of our Snowflakes is closed for the month of March and our clinic doesn’t transfer during the month of April, and our Snowflake ship date isn’t until April 12. Rebekah has a course of medication to take that is approximately 4 – 6 weeks worth and she was supposed to start that around the end of February (had to wait on timing…if you get my drift). However, things didn’t start like we thought they should so Rebekah had to take some medication to try to get things moving along. Well, it took the full 10 days of the medication and still nothing started moving…yet. It worked out that yesterday was the day and Rebekah called the doctor to start the meds and got the timeline of a week of May 3 transfer. If you do the math – May 3 is exactly 6 weeks from yesterday (3/22). I fully believe that the Lord knew when our Snowflakes would ship and when things needed to start medication-wise, and He just pushed the pause button until He was ready.

So what’s next? Well, Rebekah started her medications yesterday and will continue them for the next 4-6 weeks until the transfer. Our Snowflakes will ship from their home to thier new home at our clinic on April 12. From there the doctors will begin the process of thawing and growing them to the point where they will be ready for implantation the week of May 3. After the transfer, we’ll have to wait to make sure the embryos “stick” and start growing.

Specific things we would ask for prayer in the coming weeks:

• Safe travel of the Snowflakes during their shipment on April 12
• Safe thawing of the Snowflakes and they survive the thawing process
• For Dr. Mathews and the nurses that will be handling the Snowflakes for preparation of the transfer
• For Rebekah as she starts her medications – that we will both be diligent in administering the medications to prepare her for the transfer

It’s been a long year in preparing for all of this – and it’s really starting to sink in that this is what we’ve been working so hard for, and now that a date is set, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. We sincerely appreciate all of the prayers and well wishes – we hope to give Hannah some cousins to play with soon!

Well, it’s certainly been a while since any status updates – but there was nothing to report at the time, so I didn’t really see the need to post a “nothing is happening” entry.

We now have a ship date for the embryos – April 12. As it turns out, I’m in the wrong business. Our shipping clinic shuts down for the entire month of March, and our local clinic doesn’t do any transfers in April. It’s looking like we’ll be doing a transfer sometime in May. So even though the embryos will arrive in April, they’ll have to just “chill” (pun intended) until May when our clinic starts transfers again.

What happens in the mean time? Next to nothing really. We just have to wait and be patient. Rebekah has a course of medication that looks rather intimidating that she has to start soon to prepare for the transfer. I’m bracing for the ensuing “hormone hurricane” that may come from the super load of hormones they’re going to pump her full of.

In other random news – we’re contemplating adding on to the house before our Snowflakes show up. Rebekah’s Stampin’ Up! business is really doing well, and her classes keep growing (insert plug for her new blog at http://blog.bekalynn.com here). I’m extremely proud of her and she’s doing a wonderful job with it!! We’re thinking of adding a sunroom or utility room of some sort so that she can move her stamping stuff downstairs to keep it all centrally located – as well as providing additional “overflow” space for her classes. We’ve just started looking into this option and trying to decide whether it’ll be a do-it-yourself project (with the help of our family Mr. Handyman a.ka. Dad –  http://www.mrhandymanlkn.com ) or hire it out to a contractor. I’ve been running some designs through AutoCAD to see different scenarios and what they may look like. We’ll just have to see what shakes out as far as cost and design limitations, etc.

Until next time,
E

I had an odd thought this week as to becoming a father one of these days (sidenote:we’re still in a holding pattern for the clinics to talk to one another to arrange shipment) – what kind of legacy will I leave to my children? Well, not a legacy per se, but what traits of mine are going to be passed on? I got some of my parents finer (and not so finer depending on who you ask ) qualities. I always have said I got my book smarts from Mom and my street smarts from Dad – which both have done me well. However, I also got the good old streak of German stubbornness in there as well.

So, what of my finer/not-so-finer qualities would I like to pass down? I would hope they pick up on my work ethic as it was passed to me by my Dad. I take great pride in my work and make sure things get taken care of. To quote Dad, “Anything worth doing is worth doing right.” I’m sort of handy around the house, so I’d hope the kids would want to hang out with Dad and help with house projects and learn a little something so they could continue passing down that knowledge as it was passed to me by Dad.

Humor is another quality I’d hope to pass on. I love being a ham – and enjoy making people laugh. Just ask Rebekah and I’m the first one to act like a goofball just to get a laugh. Yet another quality I got from Dad.

I hope they pick up on some of my interests as well and want to share in those with me. I enjoyed helping Dad around the house, learning to cook from Mom (which has served me well – thanks Mom!!) as well as sharing in other activities with Mom and Dad such as bowling.

Anyway, no real point to this post other than I was just thinking over what qualities and interests of mine would my kids pick up and want to share in with me one day. Sometimes my wide ranging list of interests would probably over load the kids. Oh well, as long as one of them is a drummer it’ll all be good!

It’s been a while since an update – but that’s only because I’ve been slacking off and not diligent on these updates. We’ve had lots going on lately!

First – we’ve got embryos! I believe in my last update we were still waiting for the adoption agency to open back up from the Christmas holiday. We were selected by a very nice couple to adopt their embryos. Our doctor looked over the report on the embryos and said that things looked good for us to move forward, so we accepted the match as soon as we heard that news. Nightlight sent over the contract for our signatures and that’s been sent back along with the necessary payment and we’re moving forward!

A couple weeks ago we were able to speak with the genetic parents over the phone – honestly I thought it might be weird, but quite the contrary – they are wonderful! Like most things when getting to know new people, there were pauses in the conversation – but that was to be expected. Rebekah and I, as well as the genetic family, feel the Lord’s hand in this whole process and we just know He’s orchestrating everything that needs to be in place – and in His time, not ours. He’s teaching us patience (which is harder for Rebekah than me).

Last week Rebekah had a mock transfer with her doctor so they can make sure everything will go smoothly when the time comes to transfer embryos. Essentially they do everything they would for a real transfer except they use a saline solution instead of a solution with the embryos. Sometime this month Rebekah will begin a course of meds that will help prepare for the actual transfer – and that should put us on course for a transfer in the late March/early April timeframe. If everything works out, it looks like we could be parents around Christmas of 2010!

We certainly appreciate all the prayers so far, and would continue to ask that you pray for the Lord’s guidance during this process. We’re still moving forward and not quite to the goal yet, but we’re certainly making progress!

Just as both Rebekah and I were preparing ourselves for the possibility of our journey entering a long waiting stage during our matching, we get news we’d not expected!

First, I’ll recap what’s happened in the last few weeks. We had to wait for our Home Study report to be completed so we could send that off to Nightlight. We recieved the report in early December and sent that off to Nightlight. We also got confirmation that Rebekah’s doctor sent over her letter in the format that Nightlight needed. Once those things were completed, we only had to have one more conversation with Nightlight to finalize our preferences for our adoption.

Rebekah completed the final conversation with Nightlight on Friday, December 18. During this conversation, Rebekah was told that matching could take as long as 4 months – so we were prepared to wait a while for a match. Now, on to the good news – we got an email late on Monday, December 21 that a family had chosen us a potential match to adopt their embryos. This took us both by surprise as it took about 3 days to be matched when we were expecting it to take up to 4 months. This was definitely an answered prayer!

So, what’s next? Our adoption agency is closed until tomorrow (Jan. 4) for the Christmas holiday, so we weren’t able to do much other than review the genetic family’s profile and return the confidentiality agreement. Once the Nightlight staff is back in the office, we’ll hope to continue moving forward with this potential match. Rebekah’s doctor has some information to review and begin working with Rebekah to possibly schedule a mock transfer as a test run for a possible embryo transfer.

We’d ask for your prayers in the upcoming weeks as we seek the Lord’s guidance and His Will in this decision. We’re very excited at the possibilities of being parents in 2010 and to quote my mother-in-law, “we’re praying for a blizzard” (since the program with Nightlight is called the “Snowflakes” program).

Additionally, if you would feel so led to donate to our adoption fund to help cover some of our agency or medical expenses, please visit the “Donate” page of the blog. The link is on the upper right of the homepage. Thank you so much for your support and prayer – the way this process has unfolded could only have done so by the Lord’s hands, and through the prayers of our friends and family.

After hitting the ground running at full speed with our adoption prep work, the last few weeks have felt as if we’re doing absolutely nothing. We were playing the waiting game – waiting for Rebekah’s doctor to send the letter to Nightlight, waiting for our home study report to be finished and arrive. The waiting will certainly try one’s patience. I know during the course of waiting that our nerves certainly were shot. However, now things feel like they are moving once again.

We received our home study report on Saturday afternoon, which was the final piece we were waiting for. We sent that out to Nightlight on Monday via UPS – so it should arrive on Wednesday morning. So, what’s next from here? More waiting…

We have one more interview with Nightlight on the phone to go over any changes in preferenes for donor parents, etc. and then they will start the matching process. During the matching process, Nightlight will send our family profile to genetic parents that fall within the criteria that we’ve specfied in our preferences. Once a family selects us to be adoptive parents then we’ll start moving toward the transfer of the embryos (which includes the transportation, thawing and implantation).

In the upcoming months our patience will certainly be tried. The matching process could take 2 weeks, a month or even 4 months or more. The biggest unknown for us at this point is knowing when our match will occur. We know the matching will happen in the Lord’s timing – we just have to be patient and let things happen in His timing. What we would certainly appreciate from all our friends and family out there are your prayers. Please pray for patience as we wait to be matched – that is the toughest part for us. Many of our friends and family are new parents or will soon be parents and sometimes it feels like we’re being left behind.

Thank you all for your prayers and we hope to join the league of parents soon!